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THE WONDERS
                                                                        OF RETIREMENT

other commitments. I leaned back in my very comfortable chair           spark of learning in those who seek. After receiving most teaching
and stared at the ceiling. Yes, I will wake up in the morning, get      awards that the university gives to recognize teaching excellence,
dressed and go to work. The years will fly until illness or death will  not teaching will leave a very big void.
end the routine. Is it time to complete your life when you still had
full control over it? I wanted a completely uncluttered life when I     TEACHING IN PERSPECTIVE:
visited my children and grandchildren. I want to chronicle a world      A REALITY CHECK
of experiences. I cannot get up every morning, get dressed and go
to work. I will retire.                                                   In September 2014, I was giving my last lecture for the didactic
                                                                        lecture series that is repeated every month. The medical students
  When I was struggling with the structure for writing about re-        and residents on rotation in the NICU and newborn nursery had
tirement, the three-legged stool — teaching, service and research       gathered. As usual, I gave them the choice of “skin” or “develop-
that faculty are inculcated in — came to the rescue. So in what I       mental outcome of the premature infant.” The senior residents
am hoping will be a three-part article, teaching, of course, will be    chorused “skin.” It is like a choice between “Harry Potter” and
first. How did I “still” do the teaching leg of the stool? When I       “Harriet Lane.” I was delighted. I announced to the group that it
gripe, it is about a system, a philosophy or culture. Individual peo-   was the last time I would be lecturing on the topic and that I was
ple have touched my life and shaped it in incredible ways, and to       retiring at the end of the month. The lecture went well with one
them I give my eternal gratitude. I want you to at least chuckle if     “wow” slide after another, a collection of 44 years of clinical work
not split your sides as you read on.                                    since my residency. At the end of the lecture, there was dead silence.
                                                                        The residents hurried back to finish the day’s work and get home.
WHAT SETS AN ACADEMICIAN APART                                          The students lingered chatting with each other. Hello! I just gave
  From the moment of that epiphany to 17 days ago (Sept. 30,            the last didactic session of my academic career. There was no ap-
                                                                        plause, no thank you. I slowly closed the laptop and turned the
2014) was like coming down a gigantic slide. First, the discussion      projector off. How I wished there was a colleague by my side to
with the division head, “You are sure you want to do this?” The         acknowledge that small act of my academic life. There was no clo-
division has grown since the time I joined in 1977 from two neona-      sure. A new term was forming in my head: post academic stress
tologists to 12. Yes, it is time to make space. “What about teach-      tolerance (PAST).
ing?” he continued. I thought to myself: “You dazzle every group
of eager students with your fascinating collection of skin conditions     This would not have happened back in the days when I entered
in the newborn baby.” I decided to give my slide collection to one      the institution, 37 years ago. Albeit the total amount of time spent
of my junior colleagues. I think she has the temperament to talk        in each discipline (medicine, surgery, pediatrics, OB/Gyn, psychi-
about the mundane Erythema Toxicum, a very benign rash in the           atry, family medicine and others) has not changed, much of the
newborn baby, as though it is the most intriguing trade secret.         opportunity for bonding between the learner and each faculty in-
                                                                        volved in their educational process is drastically reduced. In the
  Teaching is a calling that keeps many physicians in academics.        past, faculty in each rotation got to know the learners more, spent
A reassuring smile to a shy 5-year-old in my dance class who is         more time together. Besides ensuring that a certain volume of
struggling to balance on one leg, or guiding the hands of a nervous     knowledge and skills were being taught, much more learning oc-
third-year medical student doing the first newborn physical exam        curred through observation, bedside laying hands on the patient,
— teaching is a calling and a gift. When you get a call in the middle   emulating behavior, interactions with the team caring for the pa-
of the night from a colleague who was a former resident, it shows       tient, navigating the system to get things done, conversation with
the comfort zone you have created where the learner feels comfort-      family — all helped shape a physician. At the end of a rotation, a
able approaching you. When a smiling dad announces that he sold         group of mentors knew a group of students reasonably well. It was
the television, when you are about to begin your speech on “No          not uncommon at the end of the rotation to go out or sit in the
TV for your baby for two years,” that is a success story. When in       café to eat where the mentor and students revealed a truer self; this
the month of July, a resident confidently enters the delivery room      is part of the hidden curriculum.
with knowledge of CPR after attending the CPR course for the
newborn baby during orientation, that is progress. When in a small        Although changes have been brewing for at least the past 25
village in a developing country, the traditional birth attendant ap-    years, as early as the 1960s evidence had started to accumulate that
plies modern concepts of resuscitation that are visionary. These in-    the public at large no longer perceived medicine as having an un-
teractions have clearly helped my own lifelong learning. They also      wavering commitment to public service. To quote The Handbook
have given me bright new ideas for teaching in different ways. I        of Sociology of Medical Education: “The rise of corporate medi-
know I will always be a learner, striving to find ways to light that    cine, the emergence of medical marketplace, Wall Street’s discovery

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